Feeling sorry for myself

I’m pretty sure that’s what my problem is. I know nothing can or will change unless I do something other than complain. The thing is though, I don’t know what it is exactly I want. I’m tired of sitting in the house all day doing nothing, as I’ve been doing for the past 4 months. I love my nephew but I guess it would be nice to talk to someone who can communicate back with me. Only problem with that is that it takes me ages to be comfortable enough to talk to someone comfortably. I know I need to get my life in order, but I’ve been saying for the longest while, I don’t even know what it is that makes me happy. I want money but I don’t care to work and I think gambling is wrong. I need an income. I’ve had the Elance opened in one of my browser tabs for what seems like forever and I’ve yet to commit to being on that site for one consecutive week. I look at job postings daily, don’t apply then say they’re not offering what I want. I’ve issues galore and I want someone to tell me what to do, but when they do, if it’s not what I want to hear, I don’t take it into consideration. If I keep on like this, son enough I’ll be a 30 year old bum because my family will be tired of putting up with me. I’m annoying, I know I’m annoying. I’m the only one who can change my fate (and God) and if I don’t put any effort into what happens to me, nothing with continue to happen.

Another day, sad by my life decisions.




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