I wish I knew how to say what I mean.

I got up the courage to talk to him. Via text of course, but apparently I’m still unable to express myself. I did not tell him that I like him, but I did tell him I was upset and what not. Now either he’s really dumb, or I’m really bad at expressing myself. Or both. He thinks it’s a joke or something and is still trying to make me laugh. Which is actually pissing me off a little more because he doesn’t get it. So my question now is, do I just ignore him forever, or keep it short? If I chose to never speak to him again, I would feel guilty but at the same time free. Neither of us have anything to give to this friendship, but whenever I make the effort its like he just throws it back in my face. But we haven’t even seen each other much. We never have, even when we lived in the same city. I am wasting my time with him. I miss my ex, mainly because he was always there for me. He liked me and I knew it. Well, I figured it out a few years after we knew each other, but I miss that friendship. I don’t feel like I have that with anyone right now. I have my sister, but it’s not the same.

I feel like my thoughts have trailed off somewhere so I’m just going to end this here.



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